OUT OF GLASS -
It is one thing to be used
Another, to use
For some time, you were my bottle of wine
Slightly a rebound while I tried to make things right
I knew I had to get sober but you were so intoxicating
I never consumed anything like you
My new booze
and when I got sober
I relapsed by using you
To fill my addiction’s shoes
You were supposed to be my cure
And all I did was lure myself into abuse
Addicted to something new
That would later come back and infiltrate me
Back to the glass I go
Because unlike you, it has never betrayed me
Made me sick maybe
It needs me just as much
And it wont let go of its grip on me because I control it
So I got real numb
To the point that I couldn't feel the car crash that snapped my neck in half
The most tangible substance I knew slipped through my fingers
And just like you, betrayed me too.
How can I forgive and forget when I
Live and regret
Thinking someone else deserves a life I made into a mess.
I wanted to hide me so I put a liquid mask on
That melted away I was left with nothing but a past that I regret
Reality took center stage while my character died.
But never again will I choose death when i’m still alive.
I’ve always had a connection to writing. When I was younger, I kept diaries and journals often. I used to fill up every page with short stories. Things about my day and especially things I couldn’t say out loud. It’s the only way I really get creative. I started doing poetry more in high school after my creative writing teacher really pushed me. I’m not much of a self-starter so I appreciate the people that are tough on me or don’t give up when I get lazy. I came up with so many pieces that I fell in love with and eventually in my twenties I started attending more spoken word and open mic events where I finally got the chance to have all the things I’ve been writing spoken. My writing style since then has been pretty reflective. I write things for myself and just hope people can relate to what I’m saying if they feel that way too.
Personal Instagram: goattnamedfelicia